There is no one closer than mother and daughter – they, like nesting dolls, knew each other even before birth. Their bond is deeper, denser and stronger than any other bond on earth. Using this, they can become the closest, most cordial friends, but, alas, this does not always happen.
Very often they become victims of the “problem of generations”, allowing their connection to collapse under the onslaught of everyday life, misunderstanding, accidental grievances, wrong attitudes in society … The destruction of the relationship between a daughter and a mother is akin to a real disaster, since there is nothing worse than losing the love and support of the closest person … But this can be avoided with very little effort.
Daughters and Mothers: Common Relationship Problems
Problem 1. “You’re a girl!” Raising her little fidget, my mother periodically reproaches her that she does not at all look like typical muslin young ladies: she is not interested in dolls and needlework, does not like skirts with frills and a fairy tale about a sleeping beauty. In most cases, the mother does not even know that these reproaches will ultimately breach the character of the child and sow in him a complex of shameful inconsistency with his social group. But after all, girls, as you know, are different – you should not be afraid to raise a child that is unlike the others, because it is from these that the most interesting personalities grow.
Problem 2. “You will have everything that I did not have!” We all have childhood unfulfilled dreams. Someone dreamed of having a huge doll, someone wanted to learn to play the piano or go to a ballet studio, but our children are not at all obliged to dream about the same thing. Before making an expensive gift to your child or describing her entire future in minutes, it is worth asking – perhaps your girl wants not a doll, but a bicycle, not a piano, but a violin and not ballet, but karate. The time has come to fulfill her dreams – and then she will become the happiest child in the world. Wasn’t that what you dreamed about?
Problem 3. “I’m a mother, I know better!” Under this motto, many mothers allow themselves to tailor the child’s life at their own discretion: criticize tastes, interests, choice of life guidelines. In fairness, it should be noted that a mother is not always wrong, but she must work hard to convey her point of view to her daughter clearly and respectfully. “You will live to see my age” is not an argument at all, it is a blunt blow to the head or an open invitation to open confrontation (depending on the nature of the child).
Problem 4. “I live only for you!” Often mothers simply dissolve in the life of their daughter, especially those mothers who do not have a personal life. They unceremoniously creep into the soul, wanting to know every moment of the life of their beloved child and always, always be there. Such people are jealous of friends, lovers and often even forbid to start relationships with those who pose a “special threat” to them. All this can lead to the fact that a daughter’s personal life will not work out, a family will not be formed and her own child will never be born. Is it worth your ambition?
The relationship between mother and daughter develops throughout life. They go through a lot of stages and blood, although not water, is still not a guarantee of mutual understanding. Only sincere love, respect and a desire to meet each other halfway will help to overcome all obstacles and build relationships that can please you all your life.