The relationship between daughter-in-law and mother-in-law is probably the biggest problem for almost all married women. What to do if it is almost impossible to find a common language with the husband’s mother? For starters, understand her psychology and accept the rules of the game!
We invite you to get acquainted with five types of mothers-in-law, we are sure that in one of them you will definitely recognise yours! The main thing is to understand what behavioral strategy to choose for such a woman!
This kind of mother-in-law is always eager to give advice to improve your life, because she always knows the right thing to do. This woman even comments on areas that she does not know much about, comes to your home and makes you feel at home. She can “clean” the refrigerator, if some products seem to her spoiled, check your cabinets, and always give advice on how best to fry meatballs and clean the faucet from the scale, because in the house where her son lives, everything must be at its highest level. How to react: The most important thing for such a mother-in-law is not to help you or improve the quality of your family life, but to control her son’s life. Don’t take the position of a victim, fight back if the situation demands it. Best of all, live separately and not too close to your mother-in-law so that you can maintain a normal human relationship with her.
Such a mother-in-law will always complain to her husband about your shortcomings, both real and invented by her. Do not be surprised if this woman behind your back will be “blowing in his ears,” his son, what a bad wife, a bad mistress and immaculate mother. But if you ask her directly, what she is unhappy with – no response. This can only make things worse, because your mother-in-law will tell your husband how inappropriately you’ve been treating her. How to react: Abstract, do not respond to provocations of a woman’s intrigue. Try to answer all of her taunts with restraint and substance, and never share the details of your personal life, not to talk about the difficulties or problems.
Such a mother-in-law feels as if you are taking her son away from her, which means she will try to accuse you of every mortal sin, both to your face and behind your back. If something negative has happened in your life with your husband, you will always be the only one to blame, and if something has increased, the credit for it goes to her son, not to you. Your husband will always be told that he deserves a better woman who will understand him and take better care of him. The only pity is that this vacancy has already been filled by her. How to react: This man is trying to assert himself at your expense, but your job is to prevent this. Regularly praise your husband, you can even point out your shortcomings in front of her and take criticism of yourself very calmly. When you no longer enjoy the criticism, your mother-in-law will change her strategy and calm down.
This mother-in-law does not want to understand that her boy is grown up and has a family of his own. This woman will try her best to keep him in her life. Do not be surprised that the husband will have to sacrifice family weekends to take my mother to the cottage, help to make repairs or digging potatoes in her garden. And all of this he has to do for the fact that his mother raised him and raised him. How to react: Re-educate such a “mommy” who wants to bind her son to her skirt for life, it is impossible. But you can make her life more fulfilling, find her an interesting hobby, buy her a trip on vacation. Helping elderly parents, of course, is necessary, but not regularly sacrificing the interests and leisure time of the family.
She will gladly give you sound advice, if you ask her yourself, but will not get to you with reproaches and dictate how to live. Quarrels with a mother-in-law are almost impossible, because she comes rarely, and during this time you try to do everything to ensure that communication with the children is full-time and in a healthy environment.